Last weekend I had the pleasure of meeting Nicholas Nammour, founder of Nick’s Mixed Drinks. I had originally heard about Nick in terms of his charity work associated with his mixology business. I must admit I was skeptical. Mixology? Charity driven drink naming contests? After a few emails and some Facebook chat, I met up with Nick, along with his boyfriend, in the Tower Starbucks so he could explain how it all comes together.

Nick, a bubbly friendly guy who is more apt to hug you hello then shake your hand, gets downright giddy when talking about his passion: mixology. “For years I have been mixing drinks for my friends,” he says with a smile, “I love making someone a drink and having them go ‘WOW!’, it makes me happy to make other people happy.”

What, I asked, is mixology? How is it different from bartending? They are similar, he assured me…. But mixology takes the whole process to the next level and is all about being tailored to the taste preference of the consumer. Bartending is making drinks, Mixology is creating drinks, and can be done on a very personal level.

And to Nick, making drinks is personal. He thrives on the connection that a drink maker should have with the consumer. “If you are serving drinks,” again with his ever present smile, “you are part therapist part provider. You want people to have a good time, but to be healthy and safe.” For Nick that means listening to what people want, knowing how to interpret that into a drink they will love, and being patient as they try new things. It also means sometimes telling them “no” (like the guy who wanted meat in his drink) and being TIPS certified. TIPs is Training in Intoxicated Persons and covers knowing how to help people who might otherwise have problems and being aware of the health needs of the consumers. For example, an old bartender trick of pouring weaker drinks as the night goes on for those who might not know their limits. “More flavor, less alcohol, plenty of water. I want them to remember the awesome drinks I made.”

Again, it isn’t just about mixing ingredients to Nick, it is about the overall taste experience. He uses organic locally grown fruit as his garnishes, makes drinks on a theme, and has built a business, Nick’s Mixed Drinks, doing so. He told me excitedly about the upcoming wedding he would be facilitating. He will be creating a few brand new drinks just for the occasion and they will all have wedding themed names.

By working weddings, retirement parties, fundraises, and other events in the LA area where he is located, Nick’s Mixed Drinks is catching on and has quickly gotten a reputation for being a sign of good taste and guaranteed good times.

So, how does any of this relate to charity? When a new drink is created, it needs a name. What more fun way to name a drink than to have a drink naming contest? But wait, it gets better. The winner not only gets the bragging rights of naming a delightful new drink, but they get to pick the charity that all proceeds and tips from the sale of that newly named drink will go to.

Most recently, a new drink was named Arabian Nights Nick will donate all future tips from that drink to The Children’s Hospital. Another recent drink, the Lady Lupus, inspired by Lady GaGa, will support the Lupus Foundation. There is even an LGBT drink name in the works (all very hush hush until it gets announced in September with dramatics and flair). All proceeds and tips of that drink will go to support a local LGBT Community Center.

Nick is big on following your passion, finding what makes you happy and finding a way to make it work. The fact that he can support some of his favorite charities while making people drinks that they love, well, he will be the first to tell you that he is doing exactly what he wants with his life.

Of course, any business could use expansion… and Nick is quick to point out that he doesn’t mind coming to Fresno for events. His business cards are proudly on display at our community center and he is available for events, fund raisers, or private parties

“Cocktails came from Prohibition.” He tells me, “People were making gin in the bathtub and it tasted awful, so you added fruit and other stuff.” We’ve come a long way from those sorts of experiments, now the mixing and flavor combinations are done with precision and almost scientific intensity. “It’s a serious thing, to create a new drink,” he says, “But it is a fun process and the rewards are totally worth it… for that ‘Wow!’ moment.”

For more information you can visit Nick’s Mixed Drinks. on Facebook or email Nick at NicksMixedDrinks@gmail.com

Fresno State GLBTQ+ Alumni & Friends Reception in San Francisco!

Fri. Sept. 2^nd • 6 - 8:00 PM
Anzu at Hotel Nikko • 222 Mason St. • San Francisco

Peter Robertson and Thomas Gaffery invite you to join Fresno State GLBTQ+ Alumni & Friends for a two-hour reception at Anzu located in the Hotel Nikko in downtown San Francisco, adjacent to Union Square. Free admission. No-host beverages, full-menu available.

This reception is being held the evening prior to "Battle by the Bay," where the Fresno State Bulldogs vs. Cal Golden State Bears at Candlestick Park.

Remember fun times. Celebrate diversity. Reminisce about the struggles and successes. Re-connect with class mates. And, recall fond memories of our alma mater, Fresno State!

(Golden Gate Bridge photo by Tony Crapo, Class of 2000. Used by permission).

FIND US ON FACEBOOK: http://www.facebook.com/#!/event.php?eid=113979952024374

Happy Friday!

It is the last weekend of August and many of our readers are back in school. Real quick, HAPYY NEW SCOOL YEAR to all the students out there. I know the transition back to the grind can be both thrilling and, at times, overwhelming. Keep your chins up and check out this article that tells you how all those “naughty” study habits might actually be good for you!

Ok, moving on… here are a few notes about the LGBT news for this week.

A Republican Indiana State Representative is refusing to resign after getting caught in a same-sex sex scandal. He maintains that he isn’t gay, and that he doesn’t know why he arranged via Craigslist to meet a young man in a hotel where he exposed himself… He has said he won’t seek reelection.

Trends of same sex couples reporting for state agencies and census beures continue to surprise. From CNN: a 50% increase in {reported} same-sex couples since 2000. This link will take you to the article as well as other stories that are more state specific.

As you probably already know, Steve Jobs has stepped down as CEO of apple leaving the way paved for Tim Cook who was “outted” earlier this year on numerous tech blogs.

A follow up on the Facebook/Teacher/Rant/Free Speech drama we talked about on this blog earlier this week. The school board has found that teacher, Jerry Buell, was not in violation of their code of ethics. He must comply to a list of directives before returning to his teaching position. (The directives are not going to be made public, but one can hope they include sensitivity training.)

The change in policy for immigration of same sex couples is mostly good news for the LGBT community.

A good article detailing why it isn’t always good when a (presidential candidate) politician remains mum on certain issues…

Some disquieting statistics from the Advocate: “According to a report from the National Coalition of Anti-Violence Programs released in July, transgender women of color experienced hate violence far disproportionate to their actual numbers in the lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer, and HIV-affected community. People of color represented 70% of all LGBT-bias-related murder victims in 2010, and some 44% of LGBT murder victims were transgender women. “

But in happier news, gay marriage comes to the gaming world.

Lastly.. if you are like me and have a huge crush on Jane Lynch, you are avidly looking forward to her return as Sue Sylvester on Glee, her hosting of the Emmy’s, and her new book! See the promos and more here!

That’s all for me. Have a fun, and safe, weekend!

It's not supposed to last

But it’s not supposed to stop

So soon

So shockingly

It’s been so long now

It can be difficult to find someone to talk to

Someone who understands

I don’t want to explain it

To someone who wasn’t there

I don’t want to paint a picture

With colors that illustrate nothing

That expose nothing

Colors only visible to those

With glasses

I don’t want a watered down moment

Replacing substance

But day by day there are less

Those that feel the chasm

To have so much removed

At such an age

It's ugly

I was...

We were...

Unprepared

To be bathed in plague

Misunderstood

Something none of us felt

Before

Now miles away

I revisit my path

And find it

Occasionally crumbling

So many voices

Gone

They should be

Here

I have washed

But cleansings

Are fragile

And repeatedly

Temporary

Well, it’s been less than a year, but Gay Central Valley’s Fresno LGBT Community Center has already outgrown our space…so we’re moving, but not too far.

As of September 1^st, 2011 the Fresno LGBT Community Center will be moving to a larger office space in the same building. We’ll still be on the first floor, just down the hall, in Suite A.

Our new address, as of September 1^st, 2011 is

Fresno LGBT Community Center

1055 N Van Ness Avenue

Suite A

Fresno, CA  93728

559-325-4GAY or 559-325-4429

Our new office will provide with a much larger public space up front and 2 separate offices behind that. One office will house the Gay Central Valley's base of operations and the other office will be for guests and visitors, meetings, etc. We will also be adding a TV to our new space so that videos and DVD’s can be viewed. The new office has a large storage area so that we can continue to expand our media lending library.

We are seeking donations for the new space besides our continuing effort to expand our media library. We are in need of more seating, pillows & tables for the public space. We are in desperate need of more brochure racks and magazine holders. We are also looking a microwave oven donation.

Our new space will facilitate more social and network gatherings. On Tuesday, September 27^th we will be hosting a Health Fair which will include tabling by local organizations and free HIV testing through the Fresno County Dept. of Health Mobile Unit, which will be on site for the day to provide those services. For that event we will be open from 9AM-4PM and will provide free lunch and refreshments. Anyone wishing to participate in this event, please click on the above link for more information.

We have also started a new Facebook group titled Central Valley HIV/AIDS Education & Awareness, in hopes of bringing together a forum of knowledge and information around the topic of HIV & AIDS in the Central Valley. Please feel free to join, post relevant notices and links, and invite others who can expand the voice of this very important issue.

We will continue to have regularly scheduled events such as Strings & Things and Community Book Groups. We are working to expand those events and welcome any suggestions and organizational assistance in those efforts.

As always, although the Community Center is currently staffed and open to the public Wednesday through Saturday, we are always open and available 7 days a week for groups and organizations to hold meetings and events. Simply contact us for scheduling.

Moving into a new, larger space has caused our rent to almost double from what it currently is. Since we are a 501(c)3 nonprofit, we rely on fundraisers and donations to maintain our operating budget. There are many ways to contribute…simply visit our Donation Page

Gay Central Valley is excited about expanding the Fresno LGBT Community Center less than a year after opening our doors. We thank the community for your continued support and promise to work to bring you more exciting and educational events in the coming months.

I mentioned it on Friday, but have you been following the story of the teacher who found himself under fire for a recent Facebook quote?

The status,: “"I'm watching the news, eating dinner, when the story about the New York okaying same sex unions came on and I almost threw up." was listed on his personal page.

The school officials received a complaint and immediately began looking into whether or not his post violated their code of ethics. The teacher was reassigned while the investigation continues.

Here’s the thing.

This is an individual who has a personal opinion which he expressed on the “privacy” of his own personal Facebook wall. We don’t know if his page was accessible to his students or not.

What he said turns my stomach. What he said is bigoted, rude, demeaning, and stupid. But just like I have the right to say what I just said, he has the right to say what he said.

It isn’t always easy, but don’t we have to accept that in our free society, we have to allow bigots and dumb asses to say their piece?

Sort of, back to that in a second.

Let’s look at a similar thing. Recently there has been a rash of celebrities spouting homophobic, hate filled rants geared against the LGBT+ community. From Tracey Jordan and Adam Carolla’s “comedic” rants to pro athletes and actors using the word “gay” and “faggot” as insults, these incidents usually have the following life span.

Celebrity shoots his/her mouth off.

TMZ or other media sources light up like Christmas trees and the story goes viral

Organizations like GLADD call for an apology.

Facebook statuses around the county abound with anger, sadness, and tirades galore. People talk about boycotting or protesting. Bloggers wax poetic or deliver their own rants.

Celebrity, though publicist, issues an apology usually containing phrases like “I never meant to hurt anyone…” or “I’m just a comedian…”

Organizations like GLADD call the apology “hallow” or “empty” etc

The news cycle finds some new and even more sensational story to dwell on.

Rinse and Repeat

Now, along with most of you who read this, I stand alongside GLADD when they ask for the apologies from the celebrities.

We ask for an apology when they use demeaning language, when they use “gay” as an insult, when they step over the line of decency. We call celebrities out on such behavior because they are supposed to be role models, because they influence people, because they have a higher level of responsibility to project positivity into the world.

Of course, they have the right to say what they say, and we have the right to ask for the apology.

But this is really important to remember: they have the right to not apologize.

Usually they go ahead and make the public statement of remorse. Celebrities have a vested interest in keeping themselves on the “good” side of public opinion.

But let’s not forget that some celebrities don’t apologize. To my knowledge Bill Maher hasn’t apologized to the Catholic Church or NOM despite their offense at many of his comments.  NOM certainly hasn’t apologized for the rampant lies that they told during the Prop  8 campaign.

Maybe that is why the apology of a celebrity so often rings hallow. We collectively know that they are in some way pandering to someone most, if not all, of the time. We know that those in power, those with influence use their words to maintain it, reenergize it, or to just plain get attention.

Which brings us back to the school teacher in Florida. When asked if he would apologize, he maintained his right to express his opinion. He is quoted as saying that his status wasn’t hateful, it was just sharing his personal beliefs.

And a lot of people agree with him and his sentiments.

This is where it gets murky. Should this man potentially lose his job because he spoke his mind?

If we punish him, don’t we have to punish anyone who says anything that someone finds offensive?

I personally struggle with this. I abhor what he said, but I do feel he has the right to say it.

Except…

Except he is a teacher. He is highly influential to his students. He is in a position of power and thus should be held to a higher standard.

The law is slow to catch up to the issue of Facebook, but harassment laws for years have struggled with this issue. As far as I can ascertain, the rules break down like this. Those in positions of authority, even when off duty, must be aware of their influence and their responsibility to protect others from the perception of harassment. This means that since he is a teacher, he shouldn’t go on Facebook and spout anti LGBT, anti Semitic, or anti African American rhetoric unless he has a reasonable expectation that none of his coworkers or subordinates will have access to it and thus be potentially offended.

Again, he can say what he wants, as long as he has the reasonable expectation that his co workers or subordinates won’t hear it.

Right or wrong, we are basically living in a world of limited free speech… Your ability to engage in free speech is limited by your position of authority , power, or influence.

Which basically means that we have different rules or expectations for different people.

Again, I struggle with this. I understand the idea behind “holding them to a higher level of responsibility due to their higher level of influence,” but it still smacks of inequality.

Of course these types of stratified levels of inappropriateness are tied into the anti-bullying laws. You do have the right to say you think all gay people are evil sinners who should burn in hell if you are a pastor, a protester, or a politician. (People might ask for an apology; you don’t have to give it.)  But you don’t have the right to say you think all gay people are evil sinners who should burn in hell if you are a teacher and you are saying it to your students, or to your student’s parents, or to your coworkers… You could, of course say it privately to your friends. Or even publically as long as you were sure none of your students, your student’s parents, or your coworkers were likely to hear it.

Is that muddled enough for you?

Any of you can hold a sign at a gay man’s funeral and harass the mourners, but if you want to make a blurb on your Facebook page spouting bigotry and hate, you better be damn sure you aren’t in a position of power, authority, or influence.

Weird.

But sort of understandable.

We need to have the right to speak out against things we find disgusting. We need to challenge the status quo and fight for new rights and changes in tradition. However, in guaranteeing us this right, we have to allow others to have the right to argue their side, to shout out heralds for the olden days, to call us sinners, etc

But, we have a social contract. We have the expectation that at work and at school we will be in a safe place where we won’t be shouted down, where we won’t have to live in fear.

We give up a bit of our freedom, to ensure that safe place.

Which is why this particular issue with the teacher strikes a chord. He violated that safe place by bringing in his outside opinions.

Or, he may have. Again we aren’t sure if his Facebook was accessible to his students, which would of course add weight one way or the other to the outcome.

Only time will tell… and we will be watching.

The 22nd Fresno Reel Pride Film Festival is less than a month away. This year, the film festival runs from Wednesday, September 14th through Sunday, September 18th.

Reel Pride is the sixth oldest gay and lesbian film festival in America. Presented in the landmark historic Art Deco Tower Theatre and the intimate Starline Lounge in Fresno's historic Tower District, Reel Pride has matured into one of Central California's largest cultural events. Each year with five days and over fifty films, the  film festival presents movies that can't be found in your local multiplex and appearances by filmmakers and stars, signature events, receptions and parties.

It's Central California's most popular gay and lesbian event: Five days of films for everyone to enjoy... a premiere cultural event in central California attracting thousands of attendees to its five-day festival of international features, documentaries, and short films.

After looking over the films to be offered this year, I can honestly say that you'll find it difficult to remember a year in Fresno Reel Pride history that will compare to the roster of films on tap for this year. It's a varied and well chosen festival of entertainment.

The Reel Pride Film Festival for 2011 includes...

"Dirty Girl"

When the local bad girl gets paired with a lonely gay boy, sparks fly, wheels spin, and the good times roll!

HIV/AIDS Documentary "We Were Here"

WE WERE HERE documents what was called the “Gay Plague” as it hit San Francisco in the early 1980s.

"Finding Identity" Youth Shorts Program

The kids are all right in this inspiring collection of short films showcasing the everyday issues and triumphs tackled by LGBT youth around the world.

Women's Centerpiece "Hannah & The Hasbian"

Hannah gave up everything to be with Breigh: her family, her religion, and men. But now Breigh’s decided she wants to go straight – as in hetero – and Hannah’s left wondering: WTF?

"Romeos"

Lukas is a young transgender man who moves to Cologne to study and work in the big city.

"Leave It On The Floor"

Get ready to get down with this modern mix of PARIS IS BURNING and RENT.

"This Is What Love In Action Looks Like"

Closeted 16 year-old teen Zach Stark's worst fears came true in 2005, when his parents sent him to a camp run by the ex-gay Christian reform group ‘Love In Action’ against his will.

Men's Centerpiece "Going Down In LA LA Land"

Attractive young gay man moves to L.A. seeking his big break in showbiz, while living with his best friend, a straight woman who spends her time shopping and chasing men

"Gun Hill Road"

When Enrique returns home to Gun Hill Road after a three year prison sentence, he finds his family transformed.

"Circumstance"

Atafeh and Shireen are best friends and rebellious teenage girls exploring Tehran’s underground art and music scene and their own burgeoning sexuality—including their feelings for one another.

Please visit the Fresno Reel Pride Website for all the details on this year's monumental event.

Fresno Reel Pride Film Festival Links...

Fresno Reel Pride Mailing List

Fresno Reel Pride Press Inquiries

Fresno Reel Pride Volunteer Information

Reel Pride Membership Information

September 27 marks the third annual National Gay Men's HIV/AIDS Awareness Day (NGMHAAD), a national initiative to focus attention on the prevention and treatment of HIV and AIDS in the gay community in the United States.

Gay Central Valley's LGBT Community Center will be OPEN on Tuesday, September 27th from 9AM-4PM in honor of this day. (We will be located in our NEW office at that time. Same building, but we'll be in Suite A at 1055 N Van Ness Ave in Fresno as of Sept 1st. Suite A is an expansion from our current location, which will allow us to expand our offerings to the community).

The Fresno County Dept of Health will have their Mobile HIV Testing Unit just outside our offices for the entire day, offering FREE HIV testing to anyone requesting it.

Inside the Fresno LGBT Community Center, we'll offer a variety of free health information and brochures, free condoms, tabling & advice from a variety of local health organizations & complimentary lunch and refreshments.

Please contact the Fresno LGBT Community Center at 559-325-4429 or email Chris Jarvis at chris@gaycentralvalley.org

Read my blog at www.kenego.com

email comments or question to mailjrcarrillo@gmail.com

Two of the most hotly followed topics seem to be colliding.  Gay and Immigration rights rarely intersect.  However, it should be noted that, in the past, organizers of both causes have come together to show a united front.  This is all about to change though.  Recent developments seem to be bringing these issues within striking distance of each other.  As a gay immigrant I could not be more delighted.

I am constantly in a two-front war.  Either I have to dodge anti-immigrant or anti-gay legislature and rhetoric.  And the victories seem to come in small increments but only to remind me that my other important cause is being left behind.  Rarely do I get a victory that advances both causes.

Late last week it was revealed that Obama has instructed the Department of Homeland Security, which overseas U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE), the agency in charge of deportations, to exercise discretion when determining which cases to prosecute.  It was revealed that the Government will seek to focus on those immigrants who pose a threat to national security.  This means that individuals who do not fall under that category may have their cases dismissed or set aside indefinitely.

Another recent development is the Department of Justice declaration that it can no longer defend the indefensible (Defense of Marriage Act).

These two recent developments will almost certainly require that Immigration Judges set aside any deportation proceedings in cases involving bi-national gay couples (especially if the non-citizen is considered a non-threat to national security).

This is evident by ICE’s decision to close the case involving a San Francisco gay couple.  This will allow Alex Benshimol and Douglas Gentry to stay together.  You can read the story here.   Yet another example is the case of Violeta Pando and her Mexican national wife Sujey.  Colorado Judge Mimi Tsankov halted the deportation case entirely.  You can read the Advocate’s story by clicking on this link.

While a sweeping and definitive win would be ideal I still celebrate the incremental victories.

DOMA, with its obviously bigoted intent, should have been repealed a long time ago.  Never has a law been so out of touch with its “intended” purpose.  How is it that a law that is supposed to defend marriage does not address the number one threat to marriage – divorce?  Neither the law nor its defenders have ever identified how it is that gay marriage is a threat to opposite sex marriage.

For government to have on its books a law that does nothing more than to inscribe into law religiously fueled bias is utterly un-democratic.

For all of those who cry patriotism and who self describe as conservative.  I ask them to take a look at DOMA and explain to me, or themselves at the very least.  How is it that you can stand for small government, freedom of religion, and liberty and justice for all and yet defend a law that spits on the face of every single one of those constitutional pillars?  DOMA is un-American.  And it is time that conservatives recognized this.

Happy Friday!

Are you all set for tonight’s Art Potluck at the Center? How about the North Tower Circle’s Bewitching Night Fundraiser? Need more? How about tomorrow’s LGBT themed Open Mic night also at the Center? Come on out! We have snacks!

It’s still summer and that means a whole slew of summer type movies are coming out this weekend ... Did we really need a Conan remake? Sigh.

In other entertainment news, the winner of RuPaul’s Drag Race, James Ross aka Tyra Sanchez, was arrested on Tuesday for possession of marijuana.

In less fun news, VA is considering a delay in new rules for adoptions that will affect the LGBT community.

Most of our readers know how volatile the subject of same sex marriage going back on the CA ballot is… well, Oregon is facing the same sort of issue.

In an update to a post I wrote earlier this week , the Advocate reports that a judge ruled on Thursday that the State of Illinois does indeed have the right to terminate its relationship with Catholic Charities.

Have you heard the anti-LGBT rant from Adam Carolla in which he mocks the acronym, wonders when we started “giving a f” about trans people, and tells gays to shut up already about marriage equality? His two line apology citing his profession as a comedian and not a politician has done little to quell the anger and hurt that his comments inspired. GLADD says his apology is “empty.” (If you click on the link you can hear his rant, but I warn you, it is hard to listen to.)

From CNN: A former "teacher of the year" in Lake County, Florida, has been reassigned while school administrators investigate comments posted on his Facebook page about same-sex marriage. The Facebook comment in question was this one: “ "I'm watching the news, eating dinner, when the story about the New York okaying same sex unions came on and I almost threw up."

A New Jersey bridal store attenedent refused to work with a lesbian bride citing that she didn’t want to participate in anything illegal. (The wedding was planned for New York but the purchase of the dress would have taken place in NJ.) Read this heartfelt response to the story for a glimpse at both a horribly bigoted woman (the sales clerk) and a wonderful straight ally (the author.)

The Obama administration has taken a step in protecting same sex couples … at least in terms of deportation. In a letter from homeland security, the administration calls for a new working group to help determine which immigration cases should be ignored or more carefully considered. Special consideration comes when the illegal person is married to a citizen, the sole caretaker of a citizen, etc. From SF Gate: Sexual orientation is not specifically mentioned, but Mary Kenney, a senior staff attorney with the Legal Action Center arm of the Immigration Policy Center said the administration has indicated that same-sex marriages are included in the definition of family for the purposes of the enforcement memo. She called the move "very encouraging.

And lastly, proof that the internet can help you learn something while bending your mind … this optical illusion and explanation is definitely worth the 3 minutes of your life.

That’s it for me. Have a happy, and safe, weekend!

This AIDS Documentary may end up being one of Reel Pride's 2011 selections...

Illinois is back in the news. A Sangamon County court heard arguments from both sides today in the ongoing saga of Catholic Charities. As you might recall, Illinois made civil unions available to gay and straight Illinoisans on June 1^st. As you might also remember, as had been previously documented, Catholic Charities refuses to place children in adoptive or foster homes of civil union couples.

The question being argued currently is whether the state had the right to discontinue its 40 year relationship with Catholic Charities without notice. The State has been considering the issue since March and terminated the relationship on June 30th by not renewing… the renewal procedure usually happens automatically and the Catholic Charities feel that their termination was unfair.

State officials say that despite the longevity of the relationship, they were under no obligation to give notice and that the relationship has to change due to the change in legal landscaping. Arguments about religious exemption fell on deaf ears as the state’s Attorney general noted that religious exemptions only adhere to clergy who are not mandated to marry same sex couples, this “protection” does not extend to government supported organizations who wish to treat civil uion couples as less than hereto married couples.

For more, read the articles from the Advocate or the  Chicago Tribune.

Family Fest, our local pride event, is just around the corner! We have something to offer everyone, including the kiddies. There is a special area designated just for them that includes: bounce house, craft stations, free prizes and a carnival area. We will also provide bread for them to feed the ducks in the nearby pond.

For us adults, the crowd favorite Waiting to Wed game will be returning this year. It’s our spin on the Newlywed Game where couples answer some pretty funny questions about each other in hopes of winning the grand prize. New this year is the first annual Pants & Pumps showdown. Teams of 4 (2 pants & 2 pumps) will compete in various challenges. The top 2 scoring teams will battle it out in a final competition for the cash prize and bragging rights of being “top” dogs! We are only accepting 5 teams, if you are interested be sure to sign up early by contacting me.

I hope you will come OUT and join us. Dessert will be provided so bring a picnic, your family and friends and come spend the day with us!

~Our event is always FREE but the park has a $6.00 entrance fee per car~

If you’d like to have a booth at the event, for more information or to sign up for the games, contact me! (559) 697-5GAY, Brooke@GayVisalia.com

The following is my submission in the upcoming USP Anthology: “Our Stories; Voices of the LGBT Experience”. Join us this Saturday night at the LGBT Community Center (1055 N Van Ness ave) for an open mic event that will feature other voices from the anthology as well as creative input from our community at large.

A Different Kind of Story

I am sitting in my living room, Cher is on the stereo. I am eating popcorn and trying to figure out what my experience as a bisexual person has been. People keep asking me, I guess they wonder how it compares.

Yes, I have faced discrimination. Yes, I have had adventures of bigotry, clashes of culture, loud moments of radical anger during protests, terrifying moments where my personal safety was at risk.  Yes, I have felt the awkwardness of trying to figure out if a potential love interest played for the team that I do. Yes, I have felt alienated, alone, bereft of a role model.

But I have also felt welcomed into many different Queer communities; the Queer Straight Alliance in high school, the Diversity Now group in college, the Billy DeFrank LGBT Community in San Jose, the Rainbow Pride in Santa Cruz, and now Gay Central Valley.

I have felt the charge, almost electrical, of a shared moment of community with a person wearing a rainbow bracelet, sporting a rainbow flag sticker on their binder, or happily applying a bumper sticker that called for people to vote no on H8te. I have felt the awesome power of people who cared when news of Prop 8’s overturn came in and my office erupted into hugging, crying, and celebrating.

I’m lucky I guess. Being bi has been a part of my life, but it has never had to be the dominant part of my life. I can pass. I have always been able to. The default position for people is to label me as straight. I don’t even get asked unless I am participating, being active, or surrounded by my LGBT extended family.

So, I have been lucky. But with that comes guilt. I know I have no idea what many of my friends and loved ones have had to go through. Coming out for me was almost a nonevent. I have gay uncles. I have gay half brothers. Gay cousins, gay best friends, gay teachers. My dad’s best friends are gay. Being bi just didn’t even register.

And then I got married. To a man. Passing again… in the extreme.

Ultimately the marriage didn’t work out. For a lot of reasons, but I can honestly say I don’t think I was ever truly honest with him about who I was, about what mattered to me, about how I saw myself in the world.

I slipped back into the dating pool. I slept with and courted both men and women. Eventually, I fell in love again… and again it was with a man. I was back in the place of passing, the place of flying under the radar.

But this time I refuse to stay quiet. I flaunt my rainbow bracelet. I take a perverse pride in questioning people’s ideas about who and what I am. I delight in telling stories of past female loves to closed minded fools who sometimes can’t keep their jaws off the floor. I bring it up. I work it into conversations. I don’t look down or to the side. I am proud of who and what I am, and I make it known.

I feel a responsibility, a responsibility to challenge stereotypes, to push the envelope, to use my ability to pass to my advantage.  I feel indebted to the past generations of my family who came out to an unforgiving and hostile world, who paved the way. I feel an unwavering respect for the LGBT youth who are struggling now, kids and young people who can’t pass, who are afraid, who feel alone. It is my responsibility, my privilege, to continue to make the world a better place for them through action, through understanding, through tireless efforts.

I had it easy, but I know I am in the minority. Now it is my turn to be there for others, to fight for our rights, to clear the way and to be supportive.

From the CD, Cher sings, “This is a song for the lonely/Can you hear me tonight?.For the broken hearted, battle scarred/I'll be by your side/And this is a song for the lonely/When your dreams won't come true/Can you hear this prayer?/Someone's there for you“ and I nod along.

Dear world, I want to proclaim, I am Kaylia, I am bi, I am a fighter, and I am here for you!

Peter Robertson, a three-time graduate of Fresno State (BA ‘92, MA ‘95 and MBA ‘05) will be presented the “Arthur Safstrom Service Award” for “outstanding service to the Fresno State Alumni Association, Fresno State and the community at large” at the Top Dog Alumni Awards Gala on Oct. 13, 2011.

A resident of Fresno, Calif. since 1984, he has volunteered for several non-profits organizations for nearly 25 years including United Student Pride, Fresno Reel Pride Film Festival, Central California Alliance, Fresno Pride Parade and Festival, Fresno Youth Alliance, GSA Network and the Rainbow Delegation.

He currently serves as the Director of Alumni Marketing and Engagement at California State University, Fresno.

In April of this year, Robertson was humbly honored with receiving the “Spirit of Caring Award,” sponsored by James and Coke Hallowell and presented by HandsOn California. He also was bestowed a President’s Volunteer Service Award from Barack Obama.

He founded the Bulldog Pride Fund in 2006, a $199,500 endowment that has provided 18 scholarships valued at $29,000 to Fresno State students.

Five years ago, Robertson spearheaded the nationally recognized and award-winning annual “I am Fresno State!” student video contest.

A life member of the Fresno State Alumni Association and a graduate of Leadership Fresno (Class XXV), a program of the Greater Fresno Area Chamber of Commerce, he attended Fresno City College.

Robertson also graduated from Mount Vernon High School (‘81) and Skagit Valley College (‘84), both located in Mount Vernon, Wash.

He and his partner of 28 years, Victor Kral, were married in 2008. They live in a historic home near Fresno’s Tower District that has been featured on several home tours.

The event begins at 5:30 p.m. and takes place at the Save Mart Center. Tickets are priced at $100 per person. To make a reservation, call 559.278.ALUM. RSVP by Sept. 22nd.

This Tuesday, August 16th, Gay Fresno will hold our first DINE WITH US event at Irene's Cafe here in Fresno.

Come to Irene's Cafe at 747 E Olive Avenue in the Tower District on Tuesday, August 16th from 6PM-9PM to participate. Here's how it works...

Stop at the table just outside Irene's front doors where a Gay Central Valley representative will be seated with an ACLU (American Civil Liberties Union)  - Gay Central Valley table sign. Pick up an ACLU Membership form, fill it out and pay the Gay Fresno representative the $20 annual ACLU membership fee. Once completed, you'll be handed a card which will designate you as a guest of Gay Fresno for dinner. Gay Fresno will cover up to $15 per person for you meal. After dinner, Gay Fresno will pay Irene's Cafe for up to $15 per person and you cover any additional cost, if any.

The ACLU will make a donation to Gay Central Valley for your participation, making this a reasonable and easy way for you to support both the work of the ACLU and the local efforts of Gay Central Valley, including the Fresno LGBT Community Center.

A second DINE WITH US event will be held at Irene's Cafe on the following Tuesday, August 23rd from 6PM-9PM.

There are many other ways to participate during the month of August in Gay Central Valley's ACLU Fundraising efforts. Click the above link to find out how...

by Reynaldo Pulido
contact via: mailjrcarrillo@gmail.com or read blog at www.kenego.com

U.S. Appeals Court Rules Against Obama's Health Care Law

I have a question for those who applauded the ruling.  The same people who are up in arms every time a judge declares discriminatory law unconstitutional or require that government afford gay people the right to marry.  The cries are all the same:  Oh judges are creating law! Judges should simply interpret law not dictate moral code! Activist judges!

To these people I ask: what do you think of the judges that declared the part of the Obamacare which mandates insurance unconstitutional, by your reasoning these are activist judges right?  Why are they dictating law from the bench?  They should stick to interpreting Obamacare not overturning it! Right?

When I asked this question to my facebook friends one them responded: these judges are interpreting law, they are not making new law about gay rights.

To him and all of you who may think the same way I say you cannot have it both ways.

You cannot say that judges who overturn laws you don’t like are within their duty and those that overturn laws you like (or uphold laws you don’t like) are activist.

When judges overturn discriminatory law they are not creating new law, they are holding the government to the standard set by the constitution, the part that requires that government treat all citizens equal. When the judges require that government stay out of people's bedrooms they are not creating new law they are holding the government to the standard set by the constitution, the part that ensures every citizen's privacy.

These judges are not giving gay people new rights.  Gay people already have rights, given to us by the constitution of this country.  What these judges are doing is recognizing that gay citizen’s have the same rights that all other citizens have.

These judges have been unable to find a legally supported reason why gay people should continue to be treated differently.  They may seem like radical activist judges.  However, they are behaving no different than judges have behaved for centuries - applying the law and its principals to new facts.

Our Country does not have a law for every possible scenario therefore our legal system allows for judges to apply law and its principals to new facts.   And yes this creates new law and standards.  And that is how we got rid of slavery, allowed women to vote and changed the voting age.

Regardless of how I personally feel about healthcare and the ruling I am glad to see the judiciary is doing its job. The judiciary is making sure that government is not infringing on individuals rights even to the extent of declaring certain laws unconstitutional.

Next time you find yourself disagreeing with a judge’s decision ask yourself is she applying principals of law to new facts? And most likely you will have to say yes.  Then instead of calling her an activist judge find joy in the fact that we live in a country where judges have the freedom to apply the law to new facts.   This ensures a vibrant and constant growing legal system and more importantly an ever more inclusive democracy.

Happy Friday!

I spent the week out of town wrangeling nieces… I hope you all had as much fun in the past five days as I have. I have a whole slew of news and notes for you, so let’s jump right in!

Paul Oetken is set to become the first openly gay man to serve on the federal bench. His Senate confirmation sailed through with even ardent conservatives voting for him. While this is a landmark, the fact that it didn’t garner more attention can be seen as a sign of the times.

Are you following the Bert and Ernie drama? A Facebook petition to Sesame Street calling for the duo to wed or for there to be LGBT characters on the show has met with resistance… from the Christian right, of course, but also from Sesame street itself who’s spokesperson is reported on stating that the two are “just best friends, created to teach preschoolers that people can be good friends with those who are very different from themselves".

Allen West, the Tea Party backed Republican Congressman took a rather confusing stance on gay rights: “Everyone has the same basic rights, and no one is telling people in the gay community that they don’t have the same basic rights that any American has,” he noted. [H]e elaborated that while he believed it to be a choice, he did not think it an inferior one that should be changed. “No, I don’t think that!” he cried upon being asked. (From the Mediaiate). No sign yet on how his belief will translate into the subject of rights.

From the LA Times: Gay presidential candidate Fred Karger has a message : The longtime political advisor knows he stands no chance of becoming the Republican nominee, but he wants to let other homosexuals know it's OK to be gay and to aim high in life.

The White House has designated Raul Alvillar, a gay administration official who currently serves as associate director for public engagement at the Office of the Vice President to the position of the interim point of contact for the LGBT community. Alvillar will replace current LGBT liaison. Brian Bond, who is leaving later this month for a position at the Democratic National Committee, and will serve this position temporarily until a permanent liaison is named,

Activists in Michigan are working hard to include LGBT protection in new hate crime legislation.

Good news for the transgendered community, at least for those incarcerated in Wisconsin: “A federal appeals court upheld a ruling striking down a Wisconsin law banning publicly-funded hormone therapy for transgender inmates, saying denying the treatment amounted to torture.” One can only hope this precedent will have far reaching consequences.

Now playing a hauntingly alluring witch in Conan the Barbarian, in theaters August 19, Rose McGowan talks to The Advocate about her activism for LGBT equality, her LGBT family, her dream lesbian crush and her desire to do a guest spot on Glee.

And lastly… in honor of Jani Lane, lead singer for Warrant (you know, from the 80s?) who died yesterday

… here is Cherry Pie!

That’s all for me. Have a fun, and safe, weekend!

It's that time of year again...

Fresno Survivors of Suicide Loss

will host our 9th Annual Fun Run/Walk Event on Saturday, September 24th 2011

at 8:00AM, Woodward Park, Mountain View Shelter

2 Mile Walk/4 Mile Run

$20 for Adults (18+) and $15 for 17 years and under

Fresno Survivors of Suicide Loss (Fresno SOS) asks that you mark your calendars for our 9th Annual event.  This is our largest fundraising event of the year and all proceeds raised will be used towards continuing to spread our mission -- "to support those who have lost a loved on to suicide and to educate our community about issues related to suicide and it's prevention." The day of the event will include freebies and giveaways, entertainment, a community resource fair, food, music, memorial signs and remembrance ceremony, dove release, and SILENT AUCTION!

Fresno SOS needs YOUR help!  We need... Event sponsors, event volunteers, donated food items, silent auction items and teams of walkers or runners at the event (team discounts are available)!

Join us on Facebook to stay up to date with the latest information on our upcoming events:www.facebook.com/fresnosos.

Visit THIS PAGE for registration form…

Leann M. Gouveia, M.P.A., Exec. Dir.
Fresno Survivors of Suicide Loss, Inc. (Fresno SOS)
2585 E. Perrin Ave. Ste. 102
Fresno, CA  93720
559.322.5877 office, 559.322.1140 fax
www.fresnosos.org
Leann@fresnosos.org

Disappointing news from San Francisco.

Even though the Obama Administration has said that they will no longer defend DOMA because it is unconstitutional, they are still enforcing it.

A San Francisco couple is being split apart due to a deportation proceedings that are being carried out because of DOMA.

Bradford Wells, a U.S. citizen, and Anthony John Makk, a citizen of Australia, were married seven years ago in Massachusetts. They have lived together 19 years, and Makk is the sole caregiver for Wells, who has severe health problems.

Defense of Marriage Act was cited as the reason for the denial of an I-130 visa, or spousal petition that could allow Makk to apply for permanent U.S. residency. "The claimed relationship between the petitioner and the beneficiary is not a petitionable relationship," the decision said. "For a relationship to qualify as a marriage for purposes of federal law, one partner must be a man and the other a woman."

Like I said, disappointing.  

Part of the fun of being in this community is the sense of, well, community that can be easily accessed by a shared sense of questing or purpose.

Yesterday I was alerted to some anti-LGBT rhetoric that was listed on a website maintained by Porterville College for a campus Christian club. It appears that after our intrepid GayPorterville writer Melissa alerted us via the GayPorterville.com blog, other community members chimed in, shared it on Facebook, wrote in their own blogs, wrote open letters, made calls, and worked together to spread the word.

More than just some of the more mundane “The Bible says gay is wrong” propaganda that many of us are almost used to from certain Christian groups, this information was presented as factual evidence and statistics about the choice of gay… presented by a club who’s faculty advisor is a current Anatomy and Microbiology professor.

The page in question contained the following…

Homosexuality, at its root, is not a sexual problem – it is a gender-identity problem. Four gay myths 1. 10% of the population is homosexual 2. A person can be born gay. 3. Once gay, always gay. 4. Homosexuality is normal in every way.

It went on from there, but you can get the gist. It breaks down the reasons that someone might decide to be gay… such as a bad relationship with one’s parents or a bad example of love from one’s parents, etc.

Again, our community acted quickly with a call to action. And within hours the page had been removed.

Hours.

Wow!

Now, a few caveats, there is a bit of evidence that the page had not been maintained for over five years. It wasn’t easily linked to the college’s pages but was embedded there. A google search early in the day could find it if you had direct quotes, but again it wasn’t easily connected to the current One In Christ page.

Still, our community reacted quickly and with purpose. The page has been removed which means that an impressionable youth or community member won’t stumble upon it and be led to incorrect conclusions.

A big “tip of the hat” to Melissa over at GayPorterville for her diligence.

I would like to end with this, as part of the page’s diatribe of negativity and soul crushing wrong information presented as fact, there is this little gem… The Gay Agenda! (Now, in my world the Gay Agenda is usually a rainbow colored list of things to do in a day, but they find it much more sinister….)

Top Ten Strategies to promote gay agenda:

1. Promote victim status; exploit safety rhetoric.

2. Start with very young children

3. Discuss alternative families / Celebrate diversity.

4. Enact school nondiscrimination codes

5. Promote coming out and”GLBT pride.

6. Encourage (and fund) pro-homosexuality student clubs.

7. Adopt homosexuality-affirming curricula.

8. Use openly homosexual teachers and role models.

9. Pro-homosexuality counseling for troubled youth.

10. Equate opposition with hate, bigotry, and prejudice.

All I can say is Yes, Yes Yes Yes… Ten times, YES! That is a great agenda! Let’s actively work on that agenda, every day!

The now removed page: can be found here

Melissa and the awesome GayPorterville.com entry: is here!

UPDATE: I received a message from the faculty advisor on record for the club. As suspected, the page was old and reflected the notes taken at a Love Won Out Conference in Fresno. The page had been taken down years ago and was only accessible via an old embed. So, it shouldn’t be searchable and no one should accidentally stumble upon the “facts” contained there.

As you might have seen, the CDC just released a report that the increase in new HIV cases is relatively stable. According to the new estimates, there were 48,600 new HIV infections in the United States in 2006, 56,000 in 2007, 47,800 in 2008 and 48,100 in 2009. The multi-year incidence estimates allow for a reliable examination of trends over time. They reveal no statistically significant change in HIV incidence overall from 2006 to 2009, with an average of 50,000 for the four-year period.

These numbers are disappointing on their own, but here are a few numbers that hit a little closer to home.

In Fresno county the number of HIV cases has risen to a cumulative 447 ( as of March 31st 2011). What is shocking is that the cumulative number for Fresno county as of December 31st 2010 was 417.

This means that in the first three months of this year, we have had 30 new cases of HIV, and that number is only going to get bigger. The number of new cases in Fresno County jumped by over a hundred from the end of 2009 to the end of 2010, (307 to 417).

Of the 447 reported cases in Fresno, 55% reflect individuals 26-44. If you add in the 83 cases of individuals between the ages of 15 and 24, you see that nearly 80% of those infected in our county are below the age of 45. Surprisingly, the group with the highest rate of infection is the 25-34 year olds with a whooping 161 cases reported. This is troubling because if you are in that age range you grew up hearing about AIDS, knowing about HIV, and should have a basic understanding of the awesome power of condoms to help sex be less risky.

One is tempted to wonder… what can I do to help?

Gay Central Valley and our allies have the opportunity to help make those numbers move in the opposite direction. By helping our community be educated, prepared, and active we can make a difference. Obviously we need to do something… here are a few ideas to help get us started…

Let’s start with education. Let’s spearhead a campaign of sex education aimed at the 15-24 demographic. By working with the local GSAs, youth groups, and holding our own Health Awareness events and workshops, we can spread valuable information.

Another idea… What about a task force of volunteers to go into the clubs and bars on a regular basis to hand out condoms, literature, and support. Bowls of condoms aren’t cutting it; we need to be more active on this front.

Along with that, let’s make the testing process easier for our community. Having one day a month be a testing day at the Community Center would help bring home the point that AIDS comes to you. Letting our community get tested in a friendlier “home turf” sort of place might help people get tested sooner and thus curb the unintended spread. I have talked briefly with Fresno’s Health department. They are looking at mid September to be a perfect time to start a partnership with us in terms of doing this.

Those are just a few ideas… what we need is YOU. What do you think? How can you help? What are some of your ideas in terms of dealing with this problem? HIV is no longer a death sentence, but it is a life shortening condition that can be avoided.

Let’s work together to bring the numbers down.

Forwarded by Chuck Krugman...thanks, Chuck!

The Legal Aid Society – Employment Law Center would like to
immediately speak with gay and lesbian couples who are registered
domestic partners with the State of California (and who did not get
married duirng the 2008 marriage equality window for whatever
reason). The LAS-ELC is seeking a class representative to advance the
constitutional rights of such couples in a case about partner benefits
available to public employees in California.

In Dragovich v. CalPERS, a class action lawsuit, the Legal Aid Society–
Employment Law Center represents gay and lesbian employees of the
state of California and their legally recognized spouses and domestic
partners who have been excluded from equal access to the popular
CalPERS long-term care program. The couples are suing CalPERS and the
IRS to challenge the constitutionality of federal law that prohibits
the enrollment of legally recognized same-sex partners (whether
married or RDP).

The Dragovich plaintiffs are all couples in which one person is
eligible to apply for the plan and the other person is not eligible.

Any state, local, or regional public employee in California is
eligible to apply for the CalPERS long-term care plan.

CONTACT:
Claudia Center
The Legal Aid Society -- Employment Law Center
180 Montgomery Street, Suite 600
San Francisco, CA 94104
ccenter@las-elc.org
(415) 864-8848 (voice)
(415) 593-0093 (fax)
(415) 593-0091 (TTY)
(415) 531-2874 (cell)

Opening today, Gun Hill Road, offers a look at the trans experience in the Bronx during the 80s. The Advocate says that actress Harmony Santana “elevates the film with a remarkable and very raw performance.”

Santana herself says, “As a transgender [person] I didn’t know if I wanted my life out there like that, but I know what I have to do and I’m going to do it.””

Here’s the preview

.

Sadly this movie isn’t showing here in Fresno… but once it becomes Netflix-able I anticipate a movie night!

Happy Friday!

I hope you all had a good week. Did you remember to send President Obama a birthday card? He turned 50 yesterday. I could do my own “Happy Birthday Mister President” ala the late Marilyn Monroe, but trust me, no one wants to see that. Speaking of the lady in the white dress, today marks 49th anniversary of her death (1962).

And on that note, let’s turn to some other news and notes of this week…

From CBS: Mitt Romney has signed a pledge promising to support a federal constitutional amendment “defining marriage as the union of one man and one woman,” The pledge was sponsored by The National Organization for Marriage.

Remember the 2008 murder of a gay teen in Oxnard CA? The trial is still going on and heated up this week when a teacher testified that the victim had taunted his soon to be killer by wearing and family members of the defendant testified to his ongoing abuse at the hands of his father.

The US 9th Circuit Court of appeals heard arguments this week that challenge an LA prosecutor’s decision to remove a lesbian juror in a case involving a gay federal inmate. A favorable ruling could extend constitutional discrimination protection to homosexuality as it already does for race, gender, and creed.

GLAAD released its fifth annual Network Responsibility Index this week giving both MTV and ABC both Excellent rating for their programming.

Miley Cyrus’s new tattoo got a lot of attention this week. Her new finger tattoo is yet another way the actress is showing her support for gay marriage.

The Advocate has an article up right now that takes a look at some of history’s greatest unsung gay heroes.

In Washington on Monday, (and by an unanimous vote) the tribal leaders of the Surquamish tribe legalized same sex marriage.

And lastly, not related but oh so very bizarre… a new art installation in Germany is causing a bit of a stir. The statue of a giant woman in the lake is… well, worth a click through at the very least. Yikes!

That’s all for me for now. Have a fun, and safe, weekend!

In 1973 The American Psychiatric Association removed the classification of disorder from homosexuality. The American Psychological Association followed suit in 1975. Now, in 2011, the American Psychological Association has unanimously (157-0) thrown its support behind same sex marriage.

"Now as the country has really begun to have experience with gay marriage, our position is much clearer and more straightforward — that marriage equity is the policy that the country should be moving toward," says Clinton Anderson, director of APA's Office on Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Concerns.

The resolution points to numerous recent studies, including findings that "many gay men and lesbians, like their heterosexual counterparts, desire to form stable, long-lasting and committed intimate relationships and are successful in doing so."

They added that campaigns working to overturn or ban same sex marriage are having detrimental effects on the psychological state of mind of LGBT Americans.

This new pronouncement is expected to have far reaching effect on public policy throughout the nation.

READ MORE HERE

1.lack of concord or harmony between persons or things: marital discord. 2.disagreement; difference of opinion. 3.strife; dispute; war.

Now that is a weird headline, and what is worse the implication is downright scary.  It implies that a person like dispute strife and war.

Yes the word has negative connotation and it is understandable that anyone in their right mind would want to stay away from discord.  But in our effort to distance ourselves from war and strife we may be losing much more than we realize.

While the ideas presented here apply to just about any part of our lives and society at large I write this with our current political atmosphere in mind.  And more specifically what inspires this writing is the recent decision by  the board for the American Conservative Union which voted to deny GOProud the opportunity to co-sponsor the 2012 Conservative Political Action Conference, or CPAC.  This to me singles and highlights a very dangerous attitude which seems to be taking hold in American politics.  Namely - our way of thinking is the right way and we will not allow or tolerate disagreement.

I have added Mr. Barron, Chairman of the Board at GOproud to my friend list on facebook.  Recently I criticized his position on an issue on his wall.  In response I received what seemed like logical critique - if you don't like what he has to say why are you his friend?  My answer: because I believe in the value of disagreement, I <3 discord.

What is the value of disagreement?  First let us look at two possible consequences to complete agreement and harmony.  For one one we will end up with a homogeneous mind set.  That means that what is believed to to be true shall not be questioned.  And any new thought and or information that may shape and yes even change perceived truth will not be allowed.  The result of this will be an unchanging mind set.  This is extremely dangerous because the key to growth is change.

Growth requires change, and change creates growth.  Examples of this in our history are extremely obvious yet we seem to forget them and more importantly forget the immeasurable value that change has awarded our society.

Had someone not challenged the then conventional truth that the earth was flat we may have never discovered America.  Had someone never challenged the conventional (and even Biblical supported) concept that slavery was the norm we would continue to treat our fellow humans as less than and ended the most extremely harmful actions taken by our society.  Had someone not challenged the truth of the day that women are as capable as men we would have a society that would be lacking the benefits of women in leadership.  These examples are extremely simplistic yet if one takes time to analyze and study them it will be life changing to realize the power of change and discord.

When the above mentioned ideas were first proposed they were extremely unpopular.  Some were imprisoned and others had to die for daring to go against the norm.

The current mind set, and yes I will be specific that of the conservative movement seems to be that of “our way or no way”.   They subscribe to the notion that “our way of life, our moral code and our political opinion is the right one and opposing it means that you are wrong and unwelcome in the discussion”.

To them I say take a look at what you are proposing and I don't mean the ideas you are proposing, I mean the philosophy you are proposing.  And then understand the logical consequences of of your concept taking further control of the political discussion.  It stands to reason that the result will be that individuals and organizations will either have to fall in line with your view or fall out. Therefore we will end up with either a homogeneous society which will limit growth.  Or we will end up with a society of one (or few) since those who do not agree with your view will be cast aside, or worse.

I am Chris Barron’s friend on facebook, because he thinks radically differently than I do.   Not that I may agree with him 100% of the time.  And not to get him to agree with my opinion or point of view.  But rather so that his point of view added to my view and life experience may bring me to a greater truth.  And that is the true value of discord.

The 15^th Annual Sierra AIDS Walk will take place on Saturday, September 24^th, 2011 at the Calaveras Big Trees State Park. The event runs from 9am-11am, with a picnic lunch included and a raffle. To register for the walk call 209-736-6792 or email info@sierrahope.org or visit online at www.sierrahope.org

All pledges over $100 receive a free t-shirt. Proceeds benefit Sierra HOPE programs serving Amador, Calaveras & Tuolumne Counties.

More information and registration forms are available at the Fresno LGBT Community Center located at 1055 N Van Ness Suite C Fresno, CA 93728 559-325-4429

The CDC has released a report indicating that in the U.S., the rate of new HIV infections is “relatively stable at approximately 50,000 new infections each year between 2006 and 2009”. It’s unnerving that 30 years into this epidemic, with information instantly available to anyone, anywhere as to how to prevent infection, that this number of new infections is listed as “relatively stable”. While that’s nothing more than a statistical statement, it sheds light on the consistent danger of HIV.

“More than 30 years into the HIV epidemic, about 50,000 people in this country still become infected each year.  Not only do men who have sex with men continue to account for most new infections, young gay and bisexual men are the only group in which infections are increasing, and this increase is particularly concerning among young African American MSM ,” said CDC Director Thomas Frieden, M.D.  “HIV infections can be prevented.  By getting tested, reducing risky behaviors, and getting treatment, people can protect themselves and their loved ones.”

MSM (Men who have sex with men) are still the most infected group (new infections), even though the CDC estimates that population at 2% of the U.S. population. Youth were most severely affected, with black MSM the only group with a significant increase in new infections (an increase of 48% over three years).

“We are deeply concerned by the alarming rise in new HIV infections in young, black gay and bisexual men and the continued impact of HIV among young gay and bisexual men of all races,” said Jonathan Mermin, M.D., director of CDC’s Division of HIV/AIDS Prevention.  “We cannot allow the health of a new generation of gay men to be lost to a preventable disease.  It’s time to renew the focus on HIV among gay men and confront the homophobia and stigma that all too often accompany this disease.”

READ THE FULL REPORT HERE

For local information on FREE HIV testing and prevention information, contact the Fresno County Health Department HIV/AIDS at…Phone: (559) 445-3434 & Address: 1221 Fulton Mall Fresno, CA 93721

There are many ways to participate during the month of August in Gay Central Valley's ACLU Fundraising efforts. In return for Gay Central Valley gathering support for the ACLU in the Central Valley, the ACLU will then provide financial assistance to our local nonprofit.

Here in Fresno, Gay Fresno is hosting two dining events at Irene's Cafe, located at 747 E Olive Avenue in the Tower District. The first event will take place on Tuesday, August 16th and the second on Tuesday, August 23rd. Both events will take place from 6pm-9pm. Come to either event, sign up for a year membership with the ACLU and Gay Fresno will buy you dinner at Irene's Cafe! (Gay Fresno will cover a maximum of $15 per person for dinner, alcohol and gratuity not included)

A representative of Gay Central Valley will be seated just outside the front door of Irene’s where you can complete the ACLU form with each $20 individual payment and then go inside Irene’s and enjoy your complimentary meal courtesy of Gay Fresno.

These events, as well as similar events in Visalia , along with local opportunities to sign up online , at the Fresno LGBT Community Center or at the North Tower Circle , will result in twofold fundraising. First, you'll be supporting the ACLU, a vital organization which upholds the Bill of Rights and the Constitution for all Americans. As a result of supporting the ACLU, you will also be financially supporting Gay Central Valley and its affiliated divisions, including the daily operation of the Fresno LGBT Community Center.

Remember, join us at Irene's Cafe on August 16th or 23rd, join the ACLU, and Gay Fresno will buy you dinner...(Gay Fresno will cover a maximum of $15 per person, alcohol and gratuity not included)

Remember 7th grade science? Do you remember Newton’s third law? “For every action, there is an equal or opposite reaction.” This is true, but more pertinent to our daily lives is that rather “regular life” sort of law that tells us that sometimes the effects of our actions have unintended consequences, unforeseen things that we could never have planned for.

This occurred to me over the weekend as I read two articles that talked about some of the interesting and possible unforeseen consequences of gay marriage becoming more accepted both socially and legally: gender disparity in who is doing it and the eventual decline in the homosexual population because people are doing it.

The first idea was discussed in an article that came to me via my good friend Chuck (Hi Chuck!) who sent me David K Li’s New York Post article in which the disparity between the number of female same sex marriages and male same sex marriages is painted in stark relief.

Connecticut (2008): 3,252 female couples and 2,053 male couples.

Massachusetts (2004): 8,404 female couples and 4,911 male couples.

New Hampshire (2010): 1,113 female couples and 411 male couples.

Iowa (2009): 1,376 female couples and 772 male couples.

Vermont (2009): 1,157 female couples and 597 male couples.

Now, some will argue that wanting to get married is more of a “female thing” and that men, whether straight, gay, or other, are more hesitant to commit.

I don’t think we have quite enough data to call it one way or the other, but one thing is for sure. Once the right to marry is established, same sex couples have to deal with the question of “should” as well as “can.” Just because you can do something, doesn’t always mean you want to.

Of course, same sex marriage activists are quick to point out, and justly so, that the point of the right to marry is the choice, not a mandate to action. I hope that all couples, same sex or not, take the time to evaluate if they are getting married due more to social pressure or actual emotional drive.

And, as same sex marriage becomes more and more common, so will same sex divorces. While it is way too early to compare divorce rates between the rainbow contingency and their hetero counterparts, I’m sure that data will e just as interesting.

Again, to all those same sex couples out there, welcome to the turmoil should/shouldn’t faced by many, many different sex couples.

The other article came to me from the online Scientific American blog and my handy google alerts. In his most recent article Jesse Bering argues that the prevalence of gay marriage could ultimately lead to a decline in the homosexual population.

He builds his case with a series of claims and assumptions, some of which I am wary of. First off, he cites numerous studies that pinpoint or attempt to pinpoint the “gay gene” as it were. Homosexuality is a genetic component, at least according to his work cited page. To actually quote him: “there are indeed clear, contributing genetic factors underlying homosexual orientation”

He cites a few popular twin studies but I would caution you, my gentle readers, to remember that biological variants are not the same as genetic creations and that so far the studies looking for the “gay gene” have not been as widely reproduced as we might wish. In fact there are several studies that link homosexuality to hormonal levels in the womb and others that link birth order to the likelihood, and still others that point to other factors or some combination of any of these… My point is that there are no definitive answers. Yet.

But okay, if we accept the claim that there is some sort of genetic reason for all the gay, the next step in his logic is pretty easy to follow. He basically says that due to social pressure and lack of options, gay people have been mating with straight people for eons and thus passing on these genes, somewhat recessive genes apparently but no matter, in to the general population.

Ok, moving on… if gay marriage becomes the norm, the number of same sex couples that procreate biologically and thus pass on the genes, will dwindle due to the cost of insemination and surrogacy, the only real biological option for same sex reproduction. Also we must take into account the lack of unplanned pregnancies, a trend that leads to a lot of hetro couples procreating, which wouldn’t be an issue for same sex couples.

His argument is basically that unless there are significant advances in reproductive capabilities, the gay genes might become further and further recessive due to the lack of gene mixing leading eventually to a dwindling population of homosexuals. That is rather a big leap, but it does make a certain amount of logical sense.

I am not a scientist, just a skeptic and an avid reader, and so even if I am wary of his final hypothesis, I do see merit in continued research into the biological and genetic components of homosexuality.

It is a frightening thought though, is it not, that the very act of global acceptance might lead to the global diminishment of our community? Only time will tell, of course, and there are advances in terms of reproduction just waiting in the wings. In the meantime, let’s brush up on our 7th grade science and continue to watch for unexpected consequences.

The 22nd Annual Fresno Reel Pride Film Festival is September 14-18th.

From James Figueroa of Fresno Reel Pride Film Festival...

Reel Pride Volunteers Needed...

Would you like to help with the Reel Pride Film Festival?

Whether you're a returning volunteer or a newcomer, we welcome you!

Some of the positions needed include:

USHERS/LOBBY OPERATIONS

BOX OFFICE OPERATIONS

FACILITIES CREW

BARTENDING

FILMMAKER & VIP HOSTS

SILENT AUCTION OPERATIONS

If you're interested please email volunteers@reelpride.com for more information.